If you haven't heard, or looked outside. It's snowing...alot...in a lot of places where it doesn't normally snow. Here in Memphis we're closed. Do not leave your house. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. While everything is closed I've been ruminating on this word: Open.
I'm notoriously closed off. Not because I think it's cool or because everyone likes a little mystery, but because being open is legit painful and it's risky, and did I say it's scary? I literally envision a door being thrown open. Birds can fly in (unwanted comments), roaches can skitter across the threshold (judgement), ugh stinkbugs can do whatever it is they do to terrorize one's life (rejection), stray cats can wander in (misplaced guidance), the cold, the heat etc.,you see the picture.
To avoid all of those unwanted things, I simply close my door. Problem solved. Case closed. The issue with that is the sunshine can't get in (life-giving relationships), neither can the fresh air (long lasting and meaningful relationships), or the sound of the rain (connection with others). People can't see inside because my door is always closed. If someone comes knockin' I only open it a crack so they can't shank me or throw sand in my eye or steal my stuff. Cracking the door works in theory, but not when the door's default position is closed. Guess who's making themselves unrelatable content?
So, *clasps hands together* in order to grow, like I assume most of us want to do, I've got to give a little; be the first one to say hello, speak up, and push past the staunchest of reservations. I've prayed for some big things when it comes to relationships this year so I'm opening my door...with shaky hands and an expectant heart (cue this blog post which i'm totally regretting now btw). I say all of this to encourage you to move through some hard things this year as well. Whether it's asking for help, being more open, being more honest, or standing up for yourself I believe we can do this!
I'm still trying to grow out here.
But you can't have my social security number, credit card info or show up at my house uninvited. I'm not THAT open.